How to Enjoy the Holidays After Divorce

Some Tips to Survive the Holidays After A Divorce

The holiday season is officially in full swing. For many families the holidays can be fun and full of wonderful memories and traditions. Unfortunately, there are some families that find this time of year to be stressful and sometimes depressing. If your divorce is recent or even pending, this time of year can bring a whirlwind of emotions. Divorce during the holidays in Andover, MA and surrounding areas can absolutely be taxing.  Having children also makes it that much more difficult to handle.

Here are some ideas to help you stay in the holiday spirit for your children and yourself as well:

  • If you have children you understand that children work best on routine. Try and maintain as many old traditions as possible, but also find fun ways to introduce new traditions for them to look forward to as they adjust to the new lifestyle situation.
  • If you maintain a good relationship with your ex-spouse, be sure to keep the lines of communication open in the weeks leading up to the holidays. Make sure you are both organized and have a way of maintaining tasks and schedules.
  • Do not ask your children to pick sides when it comes to the holidays. That is unfair pressure on them. Find ways for them to evenly split time with you and your ex.
  • If you don’t have children and are feeling especially lonely during the holidays, you should try to surround yourself with friends and family. Taking a chance to focus a little bit on you is good too.  Although some people cherish their alone time, others could benefit by having loved ones around for support.
  • You find yourself at a holiday party and friends and relatives are asking how you’re handling the divorce.  It is okay to politely tell people that you don’t feel like talking about the divorce. You can explain to them that you are trying to stay positive as you look forward to seeing what the future holds.
  • Speaking of which, decide if is easier for you to host the holiday or if it’s easier to travel to someone else’s home. Sometimes it is best to not have the responsibility and stress of planning and entertaining.  Again, we cannot stress enough that you need to de-stress!  Take it easy.  You and your family have been, or are going through, a lot.
  • Naturally, if you have children who will be home for Christmas break, find fun ways to keep them entertained but don’t stress yourself by feeling the need to keep a packed schedule. Having down time can also be healthy.
  • Set a budget for gift giving. Divorce can be expensive and parents sometimes feel the need to go over the top with gift-giving out of guilt from the divorce.  Putting down the smartphones and all the commentary on social media can help bring the family together too, allowing more opportunities to express each other’s feelings.

In an era where everyone seems to have or want an abundance of material possessions while living a hectic life that’s full of distractions, try to focus on creating more experiences with your children and loved ones. Ultimately, those are the memories that will stick with you for a lifetime.

For a family law and divorce consultation in North Andover, MA, 
contact us at Fernandez, Socci & Nieves Family Law

(978) 681-5454