The Hard Decision: When It’s Time to Walk Away From a Relationship

Divorce Attorney in Methuen, MA


Generally, relationships have their ups and downs.  Isn’t there a famous song with the lyrics, “Mama said there be days like this?”  Sometimes people grow as the relationship grows, but sometimes people don’t adapt to the relationship.  When is it a time to call it quits?  Here are some suggestions:

  1. Your partner is physically, verbally, or mentally abusive.  This may seem obvious, but you would be surprised as to how subtle this could be.  If there is any time where you feel you fear for your safety, your partner is manipulative, you find them consistently lying about what should be the smallest of things, they make you feel inadequate, they make you second guess yourself, etc., these are some signs that your partner is being mentally or verbally abusive.  Abuse doesn’t always start with physical hitting. Often time verbal and / or mental abuse is a precursor.  They’re all related in a way.
  2. You recognize there are issues in the relationship and want to work on them but your partner refuses to acknowledge them.  A relationship is about give and take and can’t be one-sided.  It is a two-way street.  If you’re finding yourself willing to compromise but your partner doesn’t, or if you constantly aim to please your partner but it isn’t reciprocated, or if you are willing to improve yourself on behalf of your partner, but your partner isn’t willing to do the same, it may be time to walk away from the relationship.
  3. One of you (or both of you) has had an affair multiple times. Relationships can survive infidelity, but when it is happening on a consistent basis, that is a big red flag. Clearly one person is looking for something else outside of the relationship.  If you find that both of you are having an extramarital affair, you may need couple’s counseling to determine why there is a lack of intimacy in the relationship.  If things can’t be reconciled, it may be time to move on from this relationship.
  4. If your relationship holds you back from other important aspects of your life.  A healthy relationship should allow each person to be the best version of themselves. If your friendships, career, health, dreams, etc. are all suffering or not making any progress because of your partner, it is time to re-evaluate and possibly walk away.
  5. You can’t rely on your partner.  A partnership is supposed to be supportive of one another, one where you can rely on the other no matter what.  If you cannot trust your partner or depend on them, if you are constantly being let down and always wondering if your partner is going to have your back when you need it the most, then it may be time to call it quits.

There is no doubt that relationships take work—and sometimes a lot of work.  However, when the relationship becomes draining, worrisome, and leaves you feeling anxious, afraid, or hopeless, it is okay to make the decision to walk away and discover a new life for yourself, even if that means sharing it with someone else.  A family law attorney can help guide you through this transitioning time.

Fernandez, Socci & Nieves Family Law, based in North Andover, MA, also serves Methuen, MA and surrounding areas, including New Hampshire.  The law firm was recently recognized as a “Best Law Firm” from US. News & World Report for 2019, for 3 years in a row.  If you are considering divorce, or have other family law-related concerns such as child custody, mediation / arbitration, modifications, pre-nuptial / post-nuptial, and paternity matters, consider contacting Fernandez, Socci & Nieves Family Law.

For more information and to discuss your situation with an experienced divorce attorney in Methuen, MA, please visit our website. To learn more about the U.S. News & World Report of Fernandez, Socci & Nieves Family Law, click here .

For a family law and divorce consultation in North Andover, MA, 
contact us at Fernandez, Socci & Nieves Family Law

(978) 681-5454 info@fsnfamilylaw.com

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