Dating Advice, Post Divorce



Dating Advice, Post Divorce

After spending some time assessing yourself post-divorce (link: Spring Has Sprung:  How To Assess Yourself Post-Divorce) you might have come to the realization that you are a loving person that deserves to love and to be loved.  Don’t think that just because your prior marriage didn’t work out means you could never love again.

Assuming you have triumphantly completed your grieving process and are ready to move on into a new relationship, you can take these few suggestions for your consideration:

·       What are your expectations?  This question is for both of you.  What do you expect in the relationship?  What about your new love?  Have they been in a divorce?  Do they have children?  Do you have children?  There are more things to consider when you begin dating post-divorce.  Maybe with the initial dates, those things aren’t important or maybe if they are deal breakers, then you should bring it up at the very first date.  Luckily, there are more dating apps and websites to help gauge your level of commitment within the relationship and what level of commitment the other party is seeking as well.

If applicable, ask what happened.  Maybe your new friend is also divorced and looking for love.  It doesn’t hurt to ask how things panned out.  Maybe the reasons their marriage failed reveals common core values that you both share.  Or maybe it sends a few red flags.  You really need to know this despite what the truth really is.

How are they financially?  This is a commonly overlooked question for the first marriage…and it can be the same the next time around!  If you plan on getting remarried, don’t beat around the bush – ask them how they are financially.  New debts and / or responsibilities could hinder the relationship.  As you may know, financial troubles are common stressors that lead to divorce.  Maybe they are financially sound or maybe they’re not.  At least you know.

What are their interests?  Do you share common interests, values and / or hobbies?  If your ex-spouse / partner constantly belittled your interest(s) chances are you felt ashamed of yourself and more disconnected from them.  Maybe this time you can find someone that is as passionate about your interests as you!  Sharing common interests and spending quality time together doing those interests does go a long way.

What are your communication styles?  Not everyone communicates the same way.  Some people share all their thoughts, some don’t, and then you have plenty of people that fall somewhere in between.  At some point, both of you need to at least feel you are on the same page, sharing the same mission and / or vision of the future with both of you in it.  


Dating post-divorce can certainly be unnerving, but following these key points of advice may help you with finding the next person who will love you for who you are.

About the Firm

Fernandez, Socci & Nieves Family Law, based in North Andover, Massachusetts, not only serves North Andover, MA, but also Andover, MA, Methuen, MA, Boxford, MA, and West Boxford, MA and surrounding areas, including Southern New Hampshire.  The law firm has consistently been recognized as a “Best Law Firm” from in US. News & World Report .  If you are considering divorce, or have other family law-related concerns such as child custody, mediation / arbitration, modifications, pre-nuptial / post-nuptial, or paternity matters, consider contacting Fernandez, Socci & Nieves Family Law.


For more information and to discuss your situation with an experienced family law / divorce attorney in North Andover, MA, please visit our website. To learn more about the U.S. News & World Report of Fernandez, Socci & Nieves Family Law, click here .

For a family law and divorce consultation serving Andover, MA, 
contact us at Fernandez, Socci & Nieves Family Law

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